Archive for January 7th, 2009

Random moment of horror

Wednesday, January 7th, 2009
This is what a three-week old turkey carcass looks like. Dont try this at home.

This is what a three-week old turkey carcass looks like. Don't try this at home.

So if you’ve been reading this blog for any length of time, you know my dog has issues with impulse control. He’s a chronic counter surfer who cannot be stopped.

However, for the first time in history, this habit had a commendable outcome. Last night he was standing up on the counter near the stove, and somehow managed to flip on the oven light. I glanced down and noticed it looked like something was in there, opened the door, and was BLOWN BACK by the smell.
You see, it so happens that I made a turkey about three weeks ago (on December 22nd, to be exact), and apparently I stuck the carcass in the oven (no doubt to keep the dog from eating it), and forgot all about it. Oops!
Oh, and then, when I was running out to the garbage with the monstrosity, and trying not to vomit at the smell, I somehow managed to hit myself in the face with a shovel and knock my glasses off. I know. I’m like a one-woman Three Stooges act. What kind of idiot leans a shovel on the garbage can anyway? Oh yeah. That would be me.
Meanwhile, having read all this stuff about how white sugar is the enemy (along with its co-conspirator high fructose corn syrup), I’ve switched to a natural sweetener for my tea.
Rather than plunk in three teaspoons of the white grainy stuff, I’m on my third day of using this magical blue agave nectar, which you squeeze out of a bottle kind of like honey. Thing is, I haven’t had one decent hallucination yet. No native drumming, no chanting, no garden hoses turning into serpents. I expected more from a product of Mexico…

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