Archive for July 15th, 2012

My new dog

Sunday, July 15th, 2012

Well, not really. Or maybe. I would do it if he was brought to Hawaii…although all kinds of circumstantial issues (would he and Dozer fight? Is he respectful of cats? Do I really have time to do twice as many walks every day, because God knows I couldn’t handle two of them on a leash at the same time: Dozer and I are almost matched pound for pound as it is) crop up when I imagine it.

Doesn’t he look almost exactly like Dozer in this picture? It’s crazy.

What the hell am I talking about?

Well, some smart animal lover has “friended” me via Facebook on behalf of a Malamute named Billee that’s been living in a kennel in South Korea for almost a year. Billee (bad name: I’m changing it to Chewie, as in Chewbaca) looks almost exactly like my Dozer, and the idea of this animal living in a kennel where a) it gets up to 104 and he can die of heatstroke or b) he could be adopted by someone who intends to eat him literally makes me cry.

Apparently they don’t do large breed dogs there – Pomeranians and Chihuahuas are more the norm – so the odds that he’ll be adopted by someone as a pet are next to zero. Odds that he’ll be adopted, tortured (they believe extra adrenaline in the system at the time of death makes the meat taste better) and cooked?: Higher than I care to think about.


He’s hairier than Dozer, though. And a little bit darker it looks like.

In fact, I can’t really look at the Facebook page because it gets me every single time, but in the hopes that someone out there is an airline employee or happens to have a trip from South Korea to the US planned in the next few months (airline regulations state he can’t fly until mid-September because of the heat), would you let me know?

Shipping him as cargo costs about $3500, but if he went as oversize luggage on someone’s ticket, it’s only about $1000. They’ve already raised a few hundred dollars – there would be no obligation or responsibility to the traveler except to check in with him at the airport, clearly with the help AMAL (American Malamute Assistance League: a great organization. Malamutes are pains in the ass and if they aren’t raised by tough, well-trained owners, they can be monsters. Seriously. Don’t get me started on what it took to turn my dog into what he is today. My mother witnessed his puppy-hood and dubbed him “Devil Dog.” He was. I love Dozer to pieces, but it’s not a breed I would recommend to most people.)


AND he swims! Perfect!

All the same, I’ve already raised one Devil Dog and I have a Devil Dog-proof house, so I know what it takes. So if that person who can life flight Chewie out of South Korea happens to be coming to Maui? Well, I’d be willing to give it a shot.

Dozer is great with other dogs and so long as Chewie doesn’t have a taste for cats, I’d be willing to add him to the menagerie permanently. He’s already gotten a dose of heat (not that it gets to 104 here) and clearly he likes the water. Plus, look at that sweet face! ***Swoon!***


Poor Foof may never forgive me, but maybe down the line I can even up the numbers and add a couple more tough as nails Himalayans and let the gang wars begin. Why not? Chaos is fun!



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