So today I went to visit a friend – someone who lived in the same house as me when I first got here – and there was an old man (I’d say 80?) visiting as well. They offered me a chair, and I’d been there about two minutes when he handed me what I mistakenly thought was a seat cushion. Good thing, too, because the chair was crawling with ants which were now all over my ass and making me itchy.

Alas, after a moment of confusion, he clarified that the object in my hands was not intended for my seating comfort so much as my viewing pleasure. Taking a gander inside, I found a few dozen lovely photos of waterfalls and scenic beaches…and a Siamese cat. The cat was juxtaposed in a way that seemed a bit “off” and it suddenly became clear; he had photoshopped his cat into all these idyllic scenes. (Dad: don’t go getting any ideas.)

There was a great underwater shot of a sea turtle that was glaringly sans-cat. I think he really missed the boat there: surely a Siamese cat riding bareback on a Hawaiian Sea Turtle would have been a memorable effort.

Anyway, this gives me an idea: Fu is often absent from the blog, but in this case that’s because he’s not even on-island…yet. Until he is transported by the magic carpet ride that is Hawaiian Airlines, perhaps I can quickly gain some Photoshop skills and work him onto the branch of a palm tree or something. Fu dancing the hula in a grass skirt? Fu driving my Jeep down the Hana highway? Fu throwing back some Mai Tais at the Grand Wailea? Fu basking in the sun in a bikini?

Imagine him now with a lei on. And looking less hostile. Can you Photoshop out looks of rage? Maybe throw some Ray-Bans on him?

So many good idea, so little time…